This is something I have been thinking about pretty often these days. I am trying to achieve a better “balance” in my life. It makes me think of the book and movie “Eat, Pray, Love.” She is always looking for balance but as the medicine man tell her its ebbs and flows.

Typically, my style of doing anything is jumping right in and do it, try things, fail or get bored move on. I like to try all the things, I am a tester.

As, someone who is always going and doing, I miss things, important things like time with friends, family. I lack making my BEST efforts here. Then I start to think about balance and do I not have enough? Am I a horrible selfish person?

The majority of my time is spent with my job, I cannot turn this off, I try but cannot find the means to stop or say no. This is when I begin to question, why do I not have this focus with people in my life or even side projects that inspire me?

Am I lazy and selfish?

I honestly do not know the answers which may make this post pointless, but I have a few ideas as to why it’s easier to drown myself in work.

Fear, I know what is expected of me daily at work, there is a great deal of unknown in my side hustles. Work is EASY. Doing new things, not so much.

Creature of habit, this may also be fear but I love a routine and have a hard time breaking out. This is a dangerous place to be, wake up and 10 years have gone by. You must break up routine, it’s where the magic is found.

Achievement, I need this to fuel my motivation and if I am not seeing achievements I will think about giving up.

Lack of patience, this is a big one, I want it all now, I want to see results now, I want to help people now, all the people and really being patient and consistent is the process that will equal progress, I know this and still have a hard time with it.

The key here is having the self-awareness to understand and recognize these things in yourself. I know this but what can I do to change and really get past the big one’s like fear and lack of patience.

That is where I will work to find balance, to make sure people are number one but also, I am working toward my goals, and what I really want in life. (These changes all the time, and that’s okay.)

To find the balance in your life you need to be super honest with yourself and really stop caring about what others think of you, is this difficult, yes of course but once it happens the doors will open up.

For myself, I have the self-awareness now it’s time to DO, just making the effort to be with people more while balancing work and side hustles. I am making the effort. You should too and it’s not perfect, I still mess it up, get introverted after a long week and just want to lie in bed in reading, but in my world that is some of the balance I need.

Thanks for reading this, I don’t think of myself as a writer just someone with a lot of random thoughts that I like to put on paper.